10 May 2011

10 Things I've Learned in My Teens P.2

Okay, all set for part two of this list? Before I get started let's recap the first five things:
1. don't change yourself for anyone
2. your body is a temple
3. people think of you far less than you think they do
4. life is the most important thing
5. everything is constantly changing.

aaaaand here are some random pics of my teen years:
 me and a couple of other kids from the sufi camp crew. hanging out by the fire circle and waiting for the rave to start. age: 16
 16th birthday, taking pics with my friend since prechool (!) lex.
 First trip to go scope out colleges! I believe this is somewhere in new york... I was really set on going to the east coast for school at first but I changed my mind by senior year :) age: 16
 taking silly pics at the homecoming game with some of my old biffles. age: 15
 dressing up with some of my residence hall-mates at LC last year for a gangsta party. age:18
 my 2nd of three proms- for some reason I cant find any pics from my senior year :( this was probably the most fun of the three though! age:16 (totally didn't realize how many of these are of me when I'm sixteen...)
theater and show choir were basically my life for the majority of my high school career. This is my with my bestie caroline in the first show I ever got a lead in- Gilmore in Godspell! funnest show we ever did, hands down. age: 15
hanging out at brian (stewart's brother)'s old apartment. I spent probably about 90% of my days throughout senior year at that infamous complex. age:17
last year, the night before our actual halloween party which was the night before actual halloween. This was our neighbor's halloween/bday party and stew and I just threw on some fake costumes for the occasion. age: 19

okey dokes now that that's done with lets get to part two of the list!

6. There are always gonna be haters. No matter what, you can't please everyone. Someone, somewhere is going to not like you or your friends or your style or your blog or whatever. Hopefully in most cases these people will just keep it to themselves and not bother to interact with you. Sometimes, though, haters gonna hate. I can't imagine why, but for some reason there are people in the world who feel like they need to bring you down or make snide remarks or talk about you behind your back. It's a very sad fact, but people can be so cruel to one another and it can cause major issues in people's lives. The trick is to not let these people get under your skin. It's really difficult to find out that someone has been saying rude things about you or to be on the receiving end of someone's anger and hatred, but you just have to remember that in actuality it has nothing to do with you. Every once in a while I get a rude comment on this blog or something of the sort and it takes a bit of effort not to get hurt by it. However, if I just take a few seconds and imagine the person on the other end- the person who has so little to do in their lives, so few things to love or care about, such poor self esteem- that they feel the need to go out into the internet and be rude to strangers anonymously. I stop feeling hurt about what they said to or about me and start feeling truly sorry for that person because I can only imagine how poorly they must feel to have to bring others down to make themselves feel better. Anyways, the point is that these sad people are out there and they're going to try to bring you down with all their might- but you just gotta remember that haters gonna hate and they ain't worth your time.

7. Mind over matter. Everything in life is mind over matter. Meaning, everything in life revolves around how you perceive it and what kind of attitude you are bringing to the table. If you wake up and feel like crap and think "ugh, today's going to be a bad day. I can tell", and then you mope around the rest of the day, it will in fact be a bad day and unfortunate things will continue to happen to you. If you wake up and feel like crap and think "I'm going to turn this around. Today is a beautiful, wonderful day and I'm so excited to live it!" and then think positively the rest of the day, you will have a great day. Even if all the same unfortunate things happen to you, you will hardly notice them because you won't be looking for them. Mind over matter applies to all sorts of other things too. Your mind is in control of your body- not the other way around- so you can use your thoughts to help you work out harder or stay on track of a diet. Lastly, the positive energy you put out into the universe will bring positive energy right back to you- kind of like what they say in that movie The Secret. Obviously that film exaggerates things quite a bit, but the basic concept is still true. If you concentrate on feeling prosperous, happy, loved, fulfilled- those things will come easily into your life. If you concentrate on how broke or lonely or sad you are, you will perpetuate those feelings and stay in that rut much longer than you need to. Our minds are very powerful things, and we are capable of creating whatever we want out of any situation with them.

8. It's YOUR life. Not your parents'. Not your spouse's. Not your friends' and not anyone else's, so there's no reason you should let anyone make your decisions for you (unless of course you're a minor and you want to do something really idiotic and your parents are trying to keep you safe). I really hate it when I see people who give up their freedoms or their personal identities for the sake of the people around them- for instance, people who feel like they have to take over their parents' business even though they want to go their own route or girls who feel like they have to marry within their church because it's what their parents want them to do. Also, people who define themselves with the person they are with and don't take the time to figure out who they are. It's your life, and you should do what you want! If everyone else around you gets to make these decisions, why can't you? No one has the right to tell you what to do, and if they try to convince you otherwise then they are simply being cruel in my opinion. Do what you want. go for the less lucrative but more interesting career. don't stay with someone you don't want to be with anymore. sell all your assets and move to another country. read what you want, listen to what you want, eat what you want. it's no one's business but your own. Of course, you should try not to do things that will literally harm you like pick up smoking, but you should feel like you are really in control of your life and you have the freedom to do whatever you want.

9. Don't be in a hurry. I know a lot of times I find my self thinking about what's to come- to next birthday, the next major turning point in my life, the next school year... and I forget to concentrate on what I'm doing right now. Life doesn't start after high school or after college or after you're married or after you retire. It's been going on the whole time and it's not going to slow down so it's completely pointless to constantly be looking toward the future. It's good to plan for stuff, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't be crossing things off your bucket list right now. Everything will go much faster than you can imagine so there's no need to be in a hurry. Savor each and every moment. Try to do something special every day. Don't waste time when you could be doing something more exciting or memorable. The future isn't guaranteed- this is the only time you have for sure, so live it.

10. Love, love, love. This is the most important thing I've learned in my teens, although I think I've been learning it my whole life. Love. Love yourself, lover your family and friends, love the strangers on the street. Even though yes, you should do what makes you happy and yes, you shouldn't change yourself for anyone and yes, it's your life so don't let anyone else influence it, you should practice all-consuming love. I always assume the best of everyone and it confuses me so much when others don't. We are all human. We all want the same things- nourishment, comfort, compassion. Reflecting love upon everyone you see and know not only makes the people around you feel wonderful and appreciated, it makes you feel amazing. Not to mention, when you are loving to other, you are far more likely to have love returned to you. Believe in the good that's inside other people. Relish in the wonderful feeling of knowing that we are all one, and we are all beautiful. Be courteous and compassionate to everyone you see- open the door for others, smile when you pass someone on the sidewalk, give people genuine compliments, make an effort to make everyone feel comfortable. Love is a powerful drug and it will make you and everyone around you feel appreciated and at peace with the world.


  1. LOVE this post! And you made me miss you and Godspell so much! Best show in HS, hands down! Love you, Em!

  2. Okay, obviously I totally relate to #6. It's definitely difficult to just let some of the things that people do go, but I always appreciate the reminder anyways. I guess we've all just gotta remember to ignore such immaturity! :)

    As for the rest of this list, and the one before it, I love it! You're such a smart lady.

  3. You sure pick up on tags fast!

    I can't believe the number of presentable pictures you have from that age. Sometimes, I wonder about the things I wore... and did at that age. Ah, youth.

  4. Aww, this is amazing! My birthday's coming up and I was thinking about doing something like this for my teenage exit.